December 05, 2005

Dumb asses in the news

My notes are italicized.

Kingston, Roane County (WVLT) - The Roane County Sheriff's Department is investigating a jail break with a unique twist. For a short time Sunday, an accused armed robber was on the run. It's a story you can only find on WVLT.

Oh no, I hope that he is not going to do anything crazy.

Eric Waddell has more on the jail break and the unusual place the escapee was captured.

Tell us about it Eric. Please, our collective breath is held.

According to Kingston Police about 9:40 a.m. Sunday morning Dustin Scarbrough wasn't where he was supposed to be.

The plot thickens, an escapee that was not where he was supposed to be. Ooh, let me catch my breath before I read on.

The accused armed robber was not in the Roane County Jail.

"I was at the block by the Kingston Courthouse and as I drove by I witnessed a white male run off the front steps heading towards the jail. It kind of caught my attention so I watched him for another second or so and when I did he got to the corner and he crouched over," says Sergeant Wes Stooksbury, from the Kingston Police Department

Heading towards the jail? Why would he be doing that?

The final clue before the arrest was jail issue shoes and pants.

6 weeks at the police academy taught him to spot those, Tennessee tax dollars hard at work.

"As he ran between the air conditioning unit and the bail bondsman's office I ran between the jail and the air conditioning unit. They are close together in order to cut him off I went down between those two buildings and got behind the first buildings on the left and waited for him to come around. When he did I caught him there just behind the jail rec-yard," explains Sgt. Stooksbury.

I certainly hope that Barney had put his one bullet in his revolver.

The Sergeant says he found on Scarbrough a package containing clothes, liquor, several prescription pills a substance believed to be crack cocaine and evidence that Scarbrough isn't a big fan of jail food.

Who doesn't need a change of clothes, I mean the jump suits are so, 2003.
"Four McDonalds Hamburgers," says Sgt. Stooksbury.

Personally if I was going to risk it all, I would have at least gotten Taco Bell... Ya know the chipotlegrilled stuft burrito or something, instead of McDonalds.

It is unclear whether or not the accused was planning to keep the items for himself or if he was trying to smuggle the items in to sell to other prisoners.

I mean who doesn't like to do a little a bump, take some prescrition pills, do a vodka shooter, and eat four Big Macs?

On a more serious note how did the escapee get out?

Who has time for seriousness? I want to eat my Big Mac.

"Fencing around the top of the rec-yard had been pried loose and damaged enough to where one of the guys could get out this guy that got out was kind of slim," says Stooksbury.

Ponder that statement. Someone, please explain it. I am lost. One of the guys could get out this guy that got out...? What?

The Roane Sheriff's Department is still investigating the case.

Seems, pretty cut and dried.

So far no charges have been filed, but Sheriff David Haggard says the escapee is likely to face second or third degree escape charges.

Only in Tennessee.

Original Article

Posted by Jess at December 5, 2005 09:01 PM | TrackBack
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