If there are indeed 3 types of orgasms, (Positive - Oh yes, oh yes, Negative - Oh no, oh no, and Spiritual - Oh God, oh god.) Does a creationist in an all men's jail have only the spiritual type or does he have others?
Background
Here,
Here,
Here,
Here, and
here
OOPS. How could I have forgotten this one?
*Update*
According to my ex girlfriend there is a 4th type. The fake - Oh Jess, oh Jess
Why no posts lately Mr. Jess? (In my best asian dry cleaner accent)
Life. It happens between blog posts.
Today I am going to write a gratitude post. Not that the people that I am grateful to will read it, (Though I am grateful to all of you.) but I am primarily writing it for my own good.
I had a remarkable Thanksgiving. It was a time that I spent with several of my close friends. (10 + but who counts?) I have never liked the Holiday season, in most people's lives it is a time of joy and retrospection. For me in years past it has been a time of sadness and drowning my pain. Why? Who knows.
This year I have changed a lot of things in my life, including friends. This year the whole experience was remarkable, though I tried to feel down, and hate the holiday my friends would not let me. When I tried to decline invitations to people's homes, threats were placed (ie "If you do not show up, and decide to sit and sulk you will be found dead floating on top of the lake like a half crushed RC cola can.") I will say however that I did not go to that person's (the threatener's) home. Though, I am sure the threat was not literal, I did not want to risk it. (She looked mean, what can I say?)
I did go to a gathering of some of my good friends. I learned how to play dominoes, how to properly pick out the pies, and how to enjoy a holiday. Today I truly am thankful for the people in my life.
I am truly grateful that I do not have to go back to the old way of life, and I am grateful that today I have a new understanding of the world and have found a spiritual prescence that I can do business with. Today, I am a different person. Today I am a friend among friends, a worker among workers, and a neighbor among neighbors.
If I am going to trudge the road of happy destiny... there is nobody that I would rather trudge it with than the people that I have come to know and love over the last eight months. (Excepting supermodels.)
Now, back to your regularly scheduled programming.
Q: Do you know why they call it PMS?
A: The name "Mad Cow Disease" was already taken.