October 05, 2005

Scenes from the mail room of my apartment complex

Neighbor: "So.... anything exciting been happening?"

Me: "Not unless I was a Swedish Goose Hunter."

Neighbor: "Huh?"

Me: "Well, it appears as if John Roberts has jumped into the supreme court and the whole death with dignity thing*."

Neighbor: "Hmm."

Me: "You are in your golden years."

Neighbor: "I'm 45 I would say that these are the aluminum years."

Me: "On your death bed no chance of recovery... Your body writhes with pain, every day you lie in bed at night hoping to reach the other side. Your doctor offers you a medical procedure to help you..."

Neighbor: "I dunno Jess."

Me: "It's constitutional and all you know."

Neighbor: "Anything else going on?"

Me: "I approached the vehicle of one of my friends today, He had his phone on speaker phone and was listening to some lady get off on the other end."

Neighbor: "Phone sex?"

Me: "Well it appeared to be a little more one sided. He looked rather bored or perhaps he had finished already."

Neighbor: "What happened after that?"

Me: "Well, I walked away didn't I?"

Neighbor: "Did you talk to him about it?"

Me: "Yes, we had lunch, though I did not shake his hand just in case."

Neighbor: "What time of day was this?"

Me: "Lunch time."

Neighbor: "Did you know the lady?"

Me: "Dunno... Didn't recognize the screams."

Neighbor: "As you like to say unfuckingbelievable."

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